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Storge is family love.God created humans in such a way that they desire to be part of a family and when God designed family,He put a special bond that binds the relatives together and this natural bond is called storge.It’s the bond that keeps siblings together even after an ugly fight.
However,most people feel this love but they never express it.It is especially difficult for most men to express storge.Most men feel like when they express love,they are not man enough,they are too soft and they are not masculine.But where did this mindset come from?Clearly,it’s not there in the Word.The bible talks about how Jesus wanted the little children to come to him.These children literally sat close to Him and some were even on His laps.Jesus is the perfect example and role model for all men.Jesus expressed his love towards children.He showed them affection.
The other hindrance to most men showing affection to their children is love has been reduced to sexuality/eros love such that they end up feeling like it’s wrong to express storge in form of affection(hugs,kisses,gifts,affirmation).Expression of storge towards children,wives,husbands and relatives is biblical.
Take a moment to read the following scriptures:
1.Hugs,kisses and embraces
|“But Jacob himself went on ahead of them, and he bowed toward the ground seven times as he approached his brother. But Esau ran to meet him, embraced him, hugged his neck, and kissed him. Then they both wept.Genesis 33:3-4 NET|
|“Then his father Isaac said to him, “Come here and kiss me, my son.” So Jacob went over and kissed him. When Isaac caught the scent of his clothing, he blessed him, saying, “Yes, my son smells like the scent of an open field which the LORD has blessed.”Genesis 27:26-27 NET|
|“Jacob stayed there that night. Then he sent as a gift to his brother Esau two hundred female goats and twenty male goats, two hundred ewes and twenty rams, thirty female camels with their young, forty cows and ten bulls, and twenty female donkeys and ten male donkeys.”Genesis 32:13-15 NET|
3.Affirmation and praise
|“Her children say good things about her. Her husband brags about her and says, “There are many good women, but you are the best.””Proverbs 31:28-29 ESV|
For some people,it’s hard for them to give or receive affection because they were deprived of storge when they were growing up.This tends to be a problem as they can’t give storge to their children.They end up showing their love in other forms like providing.Providing for the child is not enough,there is need to get involved in the child’s life-help them with their homework,spend time with them,go watch them play their favorite sport,attend their school events and cheer for them etc.Most fathers don’t take these seriously,pray for your husband that he be a father who expresses storge to your children.May they be free to talk to him,not just about serious issues like school but even silly stories children enjoy.Pray that your husband may not be ashamed to show affection towards you and your children.
Pray that if he was deprived of affection when he was young,he may learn from Jesus,it may not be easy for him but the Holy Spirit can teach him to express love.Pray that his experience may not affect how he fathers your children.Most times when storge is not fulfilled,people tend to feel lonely,rejected,empty etc.Pray against these in the name of Jesus.May he be free from all negativity that comes with the deprivation.
Intimate family relationships are among the most difficult things we must deal with as humans, because closeness leads to the exposure of who we really are, inside and out. To help us prepare for the intimacy demanded in marriage, we have a very short period in life that God seems to give us for practice.This period is the time we live with the families we were born in.Our families know our best and our worst.It is also of essence that we understand that not only do those closest to us get under our skin and irritate us, but they also have the power to wound us in a way no one can.It gets hard to be able to trust again.These wounds can be in the form of abuse-emotional,verbal,sexual etc.The scar the hurt leaves only needs Jesus to fix it and be able to trust and love again.Jesus is the only hope to being able to receive and give storge again.So pray for all couples around the world who have experienced this.If you know anyone or if you or your husband experienced this,pray that you experience God’s love so you may be able to receive and give love again.
Pray that in your family,you may be able to express storge in form of affection.